WHY I DON'T CARE FOR FEMINISM 2

'Why don't you just join the army?'
Even though he said it jokingly I knew it was not a compliment. That was my hubby's response to me 6 years ago when I felt being a woman was all minus and no plus and I handled our marital issues with alot of aggression . I was convinced that whatever issue I had with my hubby then was always going to end on his terms. I felt no one understood me  so I set out to protect myself.
Almost every issue seemed to have one solution, submit to your husband and I was literally sick and tired of hearing that . Why was that the solution to every problem?, why did I have to bend over to breaking point to get my marriage to work?, why do I have to be the one to loose weight and work tirelessly to remain attractive to this man? Why ? Why ? Why? I just wanted someone to understand things from my point of view.

It was in the course of that  rough patch in marriage that I discovered the Holy Spirit in a whole new way.
I could vent my frustrations to Him and know that He won't be critical or condescending or judgmental.
He taught me to shift the focus to myself and away from my husband and he showed me the series of events in my past that had turned me into the super aggressive woman I had become. He flashed back my childhood, my teenage years, my years as a young adult. My relationship with my dad and all the male authority figures in my life and at what stage anger had crept into my life. The Holy Spirit always reassured me 'Ijay Godswill loves you' and He would say to me 'you know I'm part of this union, and committed to seeing both of you succeed. Ask me to talk to him and I will'. And I noticed whenever I prayed ' Lord talk to Gwill I can't get through to him', he always would.

I was beginning to understand me for the first time. The only person who understood me and loved me unconditionally was Jesus and when I looked closely my husband wasn't far away. He didn't have to be hen pecked, tied to my apron strings or a sissy to prove his love for me, he needed to be a man to prove his love for me. I saw it wasn't as easy for him as I thought and that he too was bending on the weight of everything that was going on. He never set out deliberately to hurt me in anyway because he was also waging a war against familiar demons.

The 'eureka' moment happened when I saw who my real enemy was. And my enemy was also my husband's enemy. It was Satan himself with all his lying , plotting and schemeing. I realised that all the time I was thinking my husband was the issue that my real enemy was behind the scene working full time. Boy was I mad.

So I took up my armour and stood at the door of my house.
'Oya satan come an pass make I see you' I waved my sword under his nose. And as soon as he realised that his cover was blown he left us alone for a season.

If I had not made that discovery maybe I would have been back in my father's house dragging who would use the toilet first in the mornings with my kid brother.

So ladies, married ladies, single ladies we are  not at war with the men folk but with the enemy himself. His stock in trade and weapons of warfare are lies...telling us that men are our problem. Telling us to get even or get everything. Telling us that God hates us and would never be on our side. Telling us that we will always be seen as inferior and we need to become something other than who we are to gain attention .